Time for an update!
February was a weird one; January seemed to last 27 million days but February was here and gone in the blink of an eye!
I haven’t posted since the end of January. I had a couple of February posts drafted but time got away from me, I was sick, I had no wifi, I was sick again. I think the universe was conspiring against me!
I’ve been feeling a bit down too. I like to learn, be productive and have a routine, when that isn’t happening it really affects my mood. When that continues for more than a week or two my mental state takes a nose dive and suddenly I feel like the worst person in the world, like I haven’t achieved anything, like I’m worthless. I begin to agonise over every decision I’ve ever made, I compare myself to others, I hate how I look, I hate that I’m not where I thought I’d be by now. Any self esteem that I had disappears. I don’t want to interact with people, I don’t eat or sleep well. My motivation is non existent and exhaustion takes over. Writing new blog posts wasn’t even on my radar but I took some time to speak to friends about it (life pep talks ftw!), to write, read and doodle and I’m beginning to feel better.
February wasn’t all bad though – Even though I was sick I still had a lovely Valentine’s Day (celebrated on Pancake Tuesday cause we know what’s up). We went to see Black Panther, went for dinner in one of our favourite places, binge watched Friends and ate our weight in chocolate – heaven. I also had family over from the UK who I absolutely love spending time with. I’m going over there to see them at the end of the month, I can’t wait! I was really craving being outside for the whole month. I’m not what anyone would describe as ‘outdoorsy’ but I feel so at peace when I’m in a garden, a park, by the sea or just out for a walk. Last weekend, knowing that I’d been feeling run down and rubbish, my boyfriend drove us to Phoenix Park where we got coffee and went for a walk. It was freezing but so lovely. (No photos cause I’m a terrible blogger! lol)
Over the last few weeks I’ve posted a few tweets saying I was about to get back to the blog but something came up every single time that prevented me from doing it, I think I was jinxing myself!
I have some blog posts planned for the month though I probably won’t be posting as regularly as in January. I’ve got lots of family birthdays, the 3rd Annual Self Harm Awareness Conference with St. Patrick’s & Pieta House taking place in the Aviva and that trip to London. I’m also taking some time for learning, self improvement and getting outside once the snow stops so it’s a busy month ahead.
How was your February? Did you do Valentine’s Day or Pancake Tuesday? What are your plans for March?
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